Habit 5 - Seek First to Understand - Deepstash
Habit 5 - Seek First to Understand

Habit 5 - Seek First to Understand

Seeking first to understand involves developing the rare skill of empathic listening. Unlike other forms of listening, it:

  • Focuses on understanding the other person's frame of reference, not formulating a reply
  • Requires listening with ears, eyes, and heart for both content and feeling
  • Avoids autobiographical responses (advising, probing, interpreting, evaluating)
  • Creates psychological air that allows the other person to open up

This habit is powerful because most people listen with the intent to reply, not to understand. The deepest human need is to be understood, and when that need is met, people become remarkably open to influence.

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isaactu

Telecommunications researcher

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To understand someone you have to listen to them first - you need to see the problem from their perspective first.

Try Empathic Listening - You listen first, then try to understand and ask questions about the thinking process.

"The time to be understood...

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